“I want people to understand that doing the right thing often does more harm than good. The standard of normal that we aim for is imaginary. People don’t fail to meet the definition of normal gender, but the definitions fail to meet the people. Being born without a vagina was not my problem. Having to get one was the real problem. My “sexual dysfunction” posed less of a threat to my health than the parts of the Syndrome that disabled me. So why is a vagina all I was given to cope with a much greater loss?”

- Tobias K. Davis

Last night, I attended a cold reading of The Naked I, a play in two acts written by Tobias K. Davis as an alternative to the Vagina Monologues, which assumes the stable identity of being female. In Naked, Tobias takes the idea of sex and gender beyond the binary, exploring the voices of transgenders, transexuals, cisgenders, and other gender-variant identities.

* * * * * *

I stumbled into the meeting, panting from a sprint. I thought I was late. I walked in the lounge expecting to see familiar faces but I found out I almost didn’t know anyone who was there. A cap hit me on the waist and fell to the floor. I bent down to pick it up and looked for the owner.

“Hey,” said someone. I saw a guy. A girl. Neither. Either. “What’s your name?” he asked.

“Ummm…” I tentatively gave him my name. “I’m Justin.” His handshake was more ‘man’ than mine.

Introductions soon began. We went around the circle. “I’m Mickey. And I prefer the pronouns he/him/his.”

“Jenny. Ze or male pronouns…”

“Eliza. Female pronouns, she, her, hers.”

As the night went on, we read monologues and short plays from Davis’ work. The reading slowly went into discussing the relevance of the characters to our personal lives. I wasn’t straight. But I think I wasn’t a tranny, too. So I kept quiet and listened.

“I’ve had enough of people calling me ’she’, so I decided if I took T (testosterone), people would start calling me ‘he’.”

“I’ve always been happy about my body, you know, never regretted anything. I mean, yeah, there are some things I’d like to change, but I don’t know, like, I don’t want to change something I’ll regret. It’s just easier to be either man or woman. Right now, I’m both.”

“Today, looking back, I wouldn’t have taken T. I mean, I don’t regret it - but you should dictate what you want to be to the world and not let the world dictate what you are. Now, I walk into a male bathroom and no one bats an eye - it’s something I enjoy - but you know, sometimes, it’s better to be happy with who you are.”

“I wish everyone was like children. They’re so receptive. The 30 year old woman I used the date, well, she’s a single mom, and her 6 year old would always ask me why everyone calls me ’she’ when I’m a boy. Like I mean, I’ve been screwing with her mom. And she knows it but everyone else doesn’t.”

“When I had a boyfriend, he would tell me all about the male bathroom etiquette.”

He kept looking my way while he was explaining the male bathroom etiquette. I finally spoke. “Really? I never knew there was such a thing. No wonder when I said Hi to the guy standing next to me, he gave me a dirty look.”

Last night, I visited St. Luke’s and St. Margaret’s church for the memorial service of Rita Hester, a transgendered member of the community, who was killed 10 years ago. After listening to several speakers who represent various intersections and sections of the community, we walked in the -5 degrees Celsius night carrying candles. We arrived at a plaza, grouped into a circle and started reading the names of those who died this year due to hate crimes.

This year, we remembered (re-member - put them together again in our memories, our visions, and our hopes) Kellie Telesford of Thornton Heath, UK, Brian McGlothin of Cincinnati, Gabriela Alejandra Albornoz of Santiago, Chile, Patrick Murphy of Albuquerque, Stacy Brown of Baltimore, Adolphus Simmons of Charleston, Fedra of Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia, Ashley Sweeney of Detroit, Sanesha Stewart of the Bronx, Lawrence King of Oxnard, CA, Simmie Williams Jr. of Fort Lauderdale, Luna of Lisbon, Portugal, Lloyd Nixon of West Palm Beach, Felicia Melton-Smyth of Porta Vallarta, Mexico, Silvana Berisha of Hamburg, Germany, Ebony Whitaker of Memphis, Rosa Pazos of Sevilla, Spain, Juan Carlos Aucalle Coronel of Lombardi, Italy, Angie Zapata of Greeley, CO, Jaylynn L. Namauu of Makiki Honolulu, HI, Samantha Rangel Brandau of Milan, Italy, Nakhia Williams of Louisville, Ruby Molina of Sacramento, Aimee Wilcoxson of Aurora, CO, Duanna Johnson of Memphis, Dilek Ince of Ankara, Turkey, Teish Cannon of Syracuse, Ali of Iraq, and all the other trans women and men around the world who lost their lives to transphobia this year, whose faces we never saw and names we never heard, because they were living on the margins of societies who did not respect nor want them.

(Note: The list of names were taken from Melissa McEwan’s blog, Teaspoon by Teaspoon. She was present last night at the vigil with this to say: “Social justice work is like trying to empty the ocean with a teaspoon. But with enough teaspoons and enough time, we will empty it. Each of you have a teaspoon with you. Each of you, by coming here tonight, has chosen to empty that ocean of anger and hate one teaspoon at a time.”)

Dear all,

A bunch of us will be organizing a screening/vigil in conjunction with the Remembrance of Transgender Day.

Following are the details:

Date : 22nd Nov 2008, Saturday
Time : 8.00 pm
Venue : Bau Bau Cafe, Mezzanine Floor, Annexe Central Market
Movie :
A Jihad for Love (81 mins)
A documentary on gay, lesbian, and transgender Muslims across the Muslim and Western worlds.

back up
TransAmerica (103 mins)
A pre-operative male-to-female transsexual takes an unexpected journey when she learns that she fathered a son, now a teenage runaway hustling on the streets of New York.

Why are we celebrating the Remembrance of Transgender Day?

To memorialize those who were killed due to anti-transgender hatred or prejudice. Although not every person represented during the Day of Remembrance self-identified as transgender, each was a victim of violence based on bias against transgender people. It raises public awareness of hate crimes against transgender people, an action that current media doesn’t perform. Day of Remembrance publicly mourns and honors the lives of transgender people who might otherwise be forgotten. Through the vigil, we express love and respect in the face of national indifference and hatred.

On average two transgender people are murdered each month, according to global figures. This year alone 26 transgender people were killed. Out of the 26 recorded murders this year all were brutally violent, apart from one person who died by drowning – a pattern which has repeated over the past ten years and 245 murders. In the Middle East and some parts of Asia and India murders are still rife and often they’re committed by law officials so the deaths are not recorded.

And also to put an end to all sorts of discrimination/hatred/violence against people due to their sexual orientation or identity.

If you have any questions or queries, please do not hesitate to email me. (I do entertain hate mails as well.)

p/s: please bring your own candles.

We are a collective with no name so please bear with us.

Thank you to Bau Bau Cafe for the venue and Amnesty International for the projector. I think this is also supported by Tilted World and Cinta itu Buta.

“We didn’t vote on your marriage.”

Nakedwriter covers the Protest Against Prop 8 from downtown Boston.

Under the dreary skies of a downpour, I trudged along the sidewalks to the meeting place. No one seemed to be around. I wondered if the weather had dampened our spirits. “Even God doesn’t like us,” remarked one of my co-protesters.

And then, almost without warning, a group of semi-soaked individuals, umbrella and poster clad, came marching upon us. “Gay, straight, white, black. Marriage is a civil right!” they chanted. I was engulfed by the crowd, pulled along, and marched closely, chanting:

Gay. Straight. Black. White. Marriage is a civil right!

Supporters we passed cheered and clapped, while drivers honked their support. We made our way, half wet, to the plaza in front of the Boston City Hall. It was quite empty, quite quiet.

It took another half an hour before the crowd swelled. All sorts of people, families, couples, individuals, college students, teachers, mothers, legislators, musicians, artists, bikers, were present with their chants and boards.

“Prop 8 = Hate”

“California. WTF??”

“Liberty and Justice for All.”

“All Families are Equal.”

Speeches soon began. They crowds chanted for equality. Boo-ed at DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act). Chanted for change. Boo-ed at the people who mislabel us. Chanted for hope.

A journalist asked us, why were we internationals, unconcerned with the legalities of a foreign America, bothered about showing up. “America is seen as a pioneer. Change is followed elsewhere in USA’s footsteps…” pause “when it pertains the rights of LGBTQ,” someone said. “Because we’re fighting for an international cause: the right to love.”

“Because at home, women are told they can’t dress too manly,” I added.

At the date of this writing, the fatwa has not finalized by the Malaysian National Fatwa Council (NFC) yet. However, the fact NFC is planning on issuing such a fatwa is worrisome.

Should anyone have the power to legally and socially define tomboy mannerism? If the council and the policing body have the right to persecute someone based on arbitrary definition of mannerism, what is to prevent them from turning every deep-tenored, pants-wearing, bald-headed women or every limping, french-accented, foul-body odored, six-fingered men into criminals? Bottomline is attempting to criminalize individual mannerism leaves much room for abuse. Two possible abuses can stem from empowering the National Fatwa Council to monitor and control one’s behavior and possibly perpetuating Machiavellian biases towards women.

First of all, this fatwa implies that the council will be capable of defining masculine and feminine behavior. Are Malaysians not concerned that this fatwa is going to set the precedence allowing the council and its policy body the power to criminalize behavior and regulate individual mannerism according to their biases? Who is to prevent them from regulating how one speaks, how one sleeps or what color one’s car should be in the future? There is an interesting pattern of fatwa issuance lately - the 2005 fatwa against taking part in SMS contests, the 2007 fatwa against supernatural exhibitions, the 2008 potential fatwa against yoga to name a few. The Big Brother trend may soon evade every aspect of one’s life.

The other issue is the Machiavellian impact this fatwa can have. A simple example is that the National Fatwa Council could theoretically deem argumentative, aggressive and competitive behavior as masculine in nature. Given the scenario of a wife arguing with the husband, or a women aggressively pursuing a promotion at work or a talented female student needing training resources, what is to prevent a deranged husband from reporting a wife for masculine behavior after a heated argument, old-boy networked males from denying female peers promotions or budget-short schools from prohibiting female students from competition or sporting events and using the fatwa as an excuse. Hope for a fair and just trial is just that - hope.

Another point to surface is that tomboy mannerism and sexual orientation is not mutually exclusive. Just as a woman who is masculine in appearance is not necessarily a lesbian, a feminine woman is not necessarily heterosexual. Mannerism may reflect one’s sexual orientation but it is not the only defining characteristic of one’s sexuality. Attempting to prevent boyish mannerism in women to curb homosexuality is not a very efficient way to address the situation. This fatwa will only alienate straight Muslim women who do not fit into NFC’s standards of femininity, reaffirm the social bias against transgendered Muslims and offend the sensibility of most people.

One can argue that issuing a fatwa against tomboy mannerism goes against the teachings of Islam. Gender variations exist and are legally acknowledged in advanced nations and religion including Islam.

Specifically, Islamic scholars have long acknowledged at least two other gender variations: ‘Khunsa’ (intersexed) and ‘Mukhannathuns’ (transgendered)”

Further example of gender variation is contained in an interpretation this Quranic verse which offers a reference to sexual orientation and gender:
42:49 “To Allah belongs the dominion over the heavens and the earth. It creates what It wills. It prepares for whom It wills females, and It prepares for whom It wills males.
42:50 “Or It marries together the males and the females, and It makes those whom It wills to be ineffectual. Indeed It is the Knowing, the Powerful.”
Arabic: “Lillahi mulku us-samaawaati wal’ardhi. Yakhluqu ma yashaa’u. Yahabu liman yashaa’u inaathan wa yahabu liman yashaa’u adh-dhukura. Aw yuzawwijuhum dhukraanan wa inaathan; wa yaj’alu man yashaa’u ‘aqeeman: innahu ‘Aleemun Qadeerun.”

Scholars have interpret “It marries together the males and females” as the third gender – intersexed or transgendered. Other scholars have interpreted “It makes those whom It wills to be ineffectual” to encompass barren men and women or individuals who have no desire for the opposite gender.

One hopes that fellow Malaysians are able to see the risk and impact of such a fatwa.

I recently wrote this somewhere else (http://thenakedwriter.blogspot.com/). Also included are comments which I thought were pertinent to the issue.

____________________

Fatwa against Tomboys: Action and Reaction

A few weeks ago, the National Fatwa Council of Malaysia released a religious decree against women dressing like men, whatever those two identities - women and men - mean. A group of women from various NGOs decided to take to the streets to protest against this fatwa.

Rightly so. Before we can even disagree with the fatwa on trying to control the way women dress, the decree begs the question: what is it to dress like a man? To wear pants? Baggy t-shirts? Shirts without a female cut?

How much man-ness in clothing do we need to have to be considered tom-boys?

Under the syariah law of Malaysia, it is a crime to cross-dress from any one gender to another. Again, how much dressing is cross-dressing? Cosmetics on men? Flat shoes on women?

Unfortunately, the protests against this fatwa (accessed here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufgJWGmax-A - check out the comments below the video) uses alienating and dissenting language. The tone is condescending: “Short hair, who cares. Stupid fatwa everywhere.”

There are many problems with this chant: 1. it assumes that the fatwa is stupid. I agree that the fatwa is naive and archaic, but not stupid. Even if it is, calling it only 2. alienates the people we want to convince otherwise.

The main audience of the fatwa isn’t the people who are tomboys or who disagree with the fatwa. It is for those who came up with the fatwa, who support the fatwa, and who think women should not be dressing up as men. What a protest must do for its target audience, then, is engage these parties into seeing the issue with more open-mindedness, to arouse dialogue, and to initiate understanding. Engagement, not alienation.

Calling the fatwa stupid only alienates the parties who disagree with us and turns them away from any further discussion and contemplation. It confirms their suspicion of us as a group of people partaking in the many vices gender-variant members of the community are always accused of.

Short hair, who cares. Rights restricted everywhere?

Or as a friend tells me of a chant she once heard in Illinois: 2, 4, 6, 8 - How d’you know your daughter’s straight?

Why assume?

The Fatwa Council may have reasons behind their decisions - rather than to resist conviction, can we perhaps convince them otherwise?

COMMENTS:

1. I agree that the “Stupid fatwa everywhere” argument is overly simplistic, but it is often the case in political movements that you have to scream to be heard. While these protests probably are, as you rightly pointed out, not the most effective way to enact change, we cannot dismiss their value completely; after all, does it not bring awareness to the issue? Does it not inspire others, who may disagree with their tactics but still care about the same issues, to try to address the problem their own way?

This goes back to the issue of whether it is better to work from the inside or the outside. (Yay Wgs!) Working WITH the council probably will have more direct institutional influence, but if you are not in a position conducive to being listened to, then taking to the streets is not a bad way to start the conversation.

2. You are right when you say that the Fatwa Council have their reasons behind the Fatwa.Fatwas are not simply made,however,it involves deep discussions and debates among Muslim Scholars based on the Quran,the Prophet’s sayings,and also the context of our society.The fact that the fatwa might seem shallow to certain parties is due to the fact that the reasons are not communicated to the public.

My number 2 point is that these fatwas are laws that only govern muslims and are not imposed on those outside the religion.As much as a citizen of a country is required to abide the laws within his/her country,one who declares himself/herself a muslim is also required to abide the laws of Islam.I must also clarify that the fatwa of cross dressing is also imposed on muslim men.

3. Firstly, I want to address point no. 2. The issue of debate and protest over the fatwa isn’t about non-muslims fearing that we can’t do what we want to do. It’s the issue of protecting certain sectors of society who are unfairly repressed without being understood enough. Just as much as you claim that there are reasons behind the fatwa, there are also reasons behind people’s decision to dress up in certain ways. Why should one truth be greater than the other?

A rereading of the Quran and the Sunnah, as is done by Asma Barlas and Kecia Ali, shows us that the interpretation of Islam today, and the decisions made based on them, is constricted to very few people, from very limited backgrounds. Women, for one, are usually excluded although this did not use to be the case. (cf Aisyah, Fatimah, Hafsa).

I question the defense of certain fatwas on the basis that they are decided upon by highly religious and scholarly men, and then not explaining why the decision has been made that way. What happened to Ijtihad and Ijma? Why are fatwas being decreed without any evidence of critical reasoning and consensus?

Dear gals and pals,

I would like to bring your attention to a special cause today: a dear friend of mine, Yuki Choe, a male-to-female transsexual, is in dire straits and urgently in need of donations to support her living expenses.

HER CURRENT SITUATION:
Yuki is currently unemployed and living on what remains of her savings. She is also relying on some donations made through her blog but PayPal is not recognised by most Malaysian banks. She has few friends. Some are helping but not enough. Her family has turned her down as well.

She has applied for over 60 jobs but had only 2 interviews, one of which rejected her, and the other offered her a job as a mortgage and home loan provider. She is eager to take it up as a part-time job, as well as start her own business (selling art pieces), but lacks start-up capital.

She has been disqualified for state welfare. She is currently staying in a single room in USJ until she gets evicted. 

HOW YOU CAN HELP:

(1) All donors will be listed at Yuki’s blog (www.yukishock.blogspot.com). Donors can choose to be named or remain anonymous. Any amount will be deeply appreciated.

(2) Notify Yuki if you know anyone willing to offer her a job with a stable income -
Those of you involved in LGBT activism will know that many transsexuals in Malaysia entered the flesh trade after failing to notch a single decent job offer, but Yuki is determind not to meet the same fate. She is also the only actively blogging transsexual LGBT advocate in Malaysia. Let’s help her help herself, so that when she finally finds a firm footing, she can be a role model to all other transsexuals in Malaysia to lead independent, healthy and responsible lives.

(3) Spread this message around -
Post this on your blog, tell your friends, email your contacts - spread the word, get as many people as possible to chip in a little bit.

Please help Yuki get by, one day at a time. 
Your help will be deeply appreciated.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: 

She can be contacted at yuki.choe@yahoo.com.
For those who want to read about her life story, they can refer to yuki-thejourney.blogspot.com and yukishock.blogspot.com.

Please help if you can, or crosspost this on your blog too.

:: download file :: listen on iPhone ::

Duration: 1:07:23 | 31.1 MB | Mono |

Two weeks ago I introduced you to this film about Muslim Transexual Sex Workers. This week I want to get the opinion of a transexual, who is NOT a sex worker, who wants to view her opinion about this film. Yuki, who is a co-contributor to TiltedWorld.org is kind enough to chat with us about herself and this film.

Ex-Gay Watch - www.exgaywatch.com
Tilted World - www.tiltedworld.org
Yuki’s Box Of Chocolates - www.yukishock.blogspot.com
Blog on Ex-Gay Survivors: Beyond Ex-Gay - www.beyondexgay.com
Blog on transphobia: Questioning Transphobia - questioningtransphobia.wordpress.com
Transgenders in the US: Transadvocate - www.transadvocate.com

At approximately 9pm, the documentary by Poh Si Teng entitled “Pecah Lobang”, was finally aired at the studio within the Annexe Gallery at Central Market, during the Freedom Film Fest last Saturday. Touching mostly on the life and times of Muslim transsexual sex workers at the Chow Kit area, it drawn a crowd of 200 plus people inside. Besides the cast and crew of the documentary, notable attendees include members of the Legal Aids Centre, the PT Foundation crew including trans activist Ms Sulatri Ariffin and a surprise visitor who is a renowned transsexual advocate from Singapore, Ms Leona Lo.

The documentary as we have known, focused on the life of transsexual and sex worker Natasha, and other transsexuals’ turbulent living environment. The failed job hunts, family rejection and society’s ill-treatment of transsexuals was implied within the documentary as been caused by the ban on sex change surgeries in the early 1980’s upon the release of a “fatwa”. It displayed several verses from the Quran that were used to condemn transsexuals, and several profiled cases of transsexual discrimination. It also featured thoughts from several notable personalities including Dr Teh Yik Koon and Ms Sulastri Ariffin.

While the whole documentary was well meant to highlight the plight of the transsexual sex workers of Chow Kit, I felt I was watching somewhat a docu-movie prequel to the movie “Bukak Api”, which also outlined the problems faced by the transsexual sex workers community. “Pecah Lobang” went straight into several strong comments in defense of transsexuals and their lives, to touching overtures of statements that seemed to be asking for empathy from the audience. And it sadly played to stereotypes.

For instance, the continuous notion replayed throughout this documentary (it may be accidental) that transsexuals are prone to sex work, and on the streets even. It takes for granted that there is a community of transsexual sex workers that are not plying their trade on the streets, but as call girls in international escort websites, where the big cash is from the expats and foreign visitors. Also, there was a total lack of healthy transsexual role models shown, which would have placed a balanced positive view on transsexuals.

Also missing, was the lack of clarity on what is a transsexual with a transvestite, both under the umbrella term of transgender, as a segment focused on the recent case of transgenders arrested in Kelantan who were involved at a beauty pageant. I find it very unfortunate that the causes of transsexuality, from the chromosomal, biological and psychological circumstances especially recent research on the neuron count within limbic nucleus of the brain of transsexuals, were never mentioned. Instead the documentary presented viewers with the overused “they are human beings, they do not choose this life” mantra.

As for the reference of the religion of Islam used to create an atmosphere of rejection towards transsexuals, I respectfully disagree to some level. It is the cultural upbringing of the members of society that failed to distinguish gender from sex, along with the media toying with mak nyahs as jokes and comedy, as was seen in TV shows such as “Scenario”. Last month, “Gerak Khas” on RTM depicted transsexuals as sexed-up, campy and ill-mannered, while being a sex workers and also a drug pushers. It is these misrepresentations by the media that causes untrained minds to validate their prejudices.

And it is by these ill-founded dogmas that people resort to use religion as justifications for their bigotry against transsexuals and this not only includes Islam, but also Christianity. “Pecah Lobang” highlights only a fragment of the community; but other transsexuals, those who are well-adjusted in society to those who are struggling not to fall down the sex work trap hole, may feel themselves stigmatized by a public labeling all transsexuals as sex-workers. Perception is a dangerous element; as well intentioned this documentary is, it may infringe the safe space of transsexuals who do not wish for sex work.

During the comments session after the viewing of “Pecah Lobang”, I was disappointed with some of the members of the audience who seemingly questioned Ms Poh Si Teng for doing the movie in the guise of “well-mannered talk”. One question that came to mind was whether she is using the movie in a way of promoting human rights as to making the wrong, right. I would have told the gentleman, there is nothing wrong with simply existing without harming others. These were also other questions Ms Teng seemed to have difficulty in answering, which explains the countless “I do not know”’s she used.

It would note however, with all of this film’s shortcomings, I believe Ms Teng was very courageous to go out on her own way to do this movie. She had said that she is not a filmaker, rather a journalist, so I do admit I am sad that the issue of transsexuals was poorly researched by her. But this could be a good starting point for more openness in talks about transsexuals, and Ms Teng at 24, will learn in time. As a member of the Legal Aids Centre commented, she only scratched the surface of the transsexuality issues. But, this could be a start of more things to come, positive ones hopefully, for our community.

Voice Comment: (206) 888-JOHN

:: download file :: listen on iPhone ::

Duration: 46:44 | 21.8 MB | Mono |

I am so excited to chat with PohSi Teng, one of the three winners of the Freedom Film Festival (FFF) 2008. Her bold subject in her documentary caught my attention. Find out about PohSi herself and her documentary project of Muslim transexual workers in Malaysia. She also talked about the challenges she faced and the things she got out of this project. I can’t wait to see this documentary myself. I will give you my opinion as soon as I get my hands on this film.

Those of you who are in Malaysia, these are the upcoming screenings. For more information, go to PohSi’s website for more detailed information reserving your tickets. All admissions are free.

Thanks to Gabrielle for posting the article here on TiltedWorld.org earlier. That’s what got me in touch with Teng PohSi.

Official Website of “Pecah Lobang”, the documentary

PT Foundation

Legal Aid Centre