Many thanks to JC for contributing this post.

As we walk on the long weary path we call our lives, we stumble upon parts in which we are forced to make a choice. Some choose to take the path less taken; some choose to follow their hearts’ desires. But all in all, will it bring us to the future we hope for remains questionable. The choices we make and the choices others make are sometimes merely a simple indication of our hearts’ desires. What do we want for ourselves? Some of us can’t really answer this question. Those who are generally holier than thou would reply that they want to please God and to live in His will. Others who are deluded by the prospects of fame and fortune will merely say I want to be rich and famous. But what do YOU want? What does your heart desire most? That’s a question you have to answer in your own time, and till you manage to answer this question, you haven’t truly matured yet.While others may believe that our choices are selfish and against both God’s will and against the norm, we pursue them anyway. In the process, others will still try to change our choices as a feeble attempt to put their choices in our path. Your parents will do certain things and say it’s for your own good. Your friends will say that they’re doing this because they care for you. Both reasons are generally truthful but the very last question remains, but what’s your role in this decision making process? Will their choice fill the void in your heart? Will you be the person you dream of being and all in all, will that silent wish of yours ever come true? There is no reason for you take make a choice just to please others. Perhaps it is time for us to go against the world and stand up for who and what we are.

We have to come to an understanding that all of us seek different things and that’s why sometimes we end up believing that the other party is misled. What is right and what is wrong remains a question without an answer. While some of us may place their lives on the top of their decision making hierarchy, others may not do so. A mother who had lost her daughter in an accident may put her only remaining son on the very top of her list of factors to consider while a father in the same condition may put his supply of alcohol and sex on the top of his list. The general human nature would believe that what the mother is doing is right and what the father is doing is obviously wrong. But who would ever know that it was the mother’s protective actions that broke her homosexual son’s heart whilst the father’s choice of being sick and drunk that made the family stay together to nurse him? The way life works is beyond our comprehension. We are but mere mortals living to fulfill our very own purpose.  Every step we take to realize our dreams will sometimes be the undoing of our wishes. But then again, it’s just the human nature to keep on trying. Sometimes we try so hard, even when we know that the future we are trying so hard to avoid is indeed, inevitable. It’s like trying to make a straight guy fall in love with you, you know the odds are definitely against you but you love him anyway. Secretly you are betting on the 0.1% chance that he may be a bisexual even when he secretly onfides in you that he’s interested in a certain hot chick.

I fell in love with my best friend, and even though I knew he was straight and I would get hurt, I loved him anyway.Guess all we can do is to keep on choosing, regardless of where it’ll lead us to. We only have a choice over the action and none over the result. This little power of choice is all we have, though it can’t always bring us the ending that we want, we can always still live in denial and believe that it will bring the happy ever after we yearn. This little bit of belief is however what we call HOPE.

Wherever the trail leads you and whatever the choice you make, have hope and one day it will lead you to your very own fairytale.

 

Voice Comment: (206) 338-ONG-9

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Duration: 26:18 | 24.5 MB | Stereo |

Along with over 300 people, I attended the Kansas City’s own Fight the H8 rally. I chatted with many people and asking them why was it important that they are out there in the cold to be in this rally.

This will be one of the top issues of my life to fight for the right that was taken away from me simply because I’m gay. Yes, this is personal. You won’t stop hearing from me.

Listen to the audio podcast by clicking “play” on the audio player above.

“We didn’t vote on your marriage.”

Nakedwriter covers the Protest Against Prop 8 from downtown Boston.

Under the dreary skies of a downpour, I trudged along the sidewalks to the meeting place. No one seemed to be around. I wondered if the weather had dampened our spirits. “Even God doesn’t like us,” remarked one of my co-protesters.

And then, almost without warning, a group of semi-soaked individuals, umbrella and poster clad, came marching upon us. “Gay, straight, white, black. Marriage is a civil right!” they chanted. I was engulfed by the crowd, pulled along, and marched closely, chanting:

Gay. Straight. Black. White. Marriage is a civil right!

Supporters we passed cheered and clapped, while drivers honked their support. We made our way, half wet, to the plaza in front of the Boston City Hall. It was quite empty, quite quiet.

It took another half an hour before the crowd swelled. All sorts of people, families, couples, individuals, college students, teachers, mothers, legislators, musicians, artists, bikers, were present with their chants and boards.

“Prop 8 = Hate”

“California. WTF??”

“Liberty and Justice for All.”

“All Families are Equal.”

Speeches soon began. They crowds chanted for equality. Boo-ed at DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act). Chanted for change. Boo-ed at the people who mislabel us. Chanted for hope.

A journalist asked us, why were we internationals, unconcerned with the legalities of a foreign America, bothered about showing up. “America is seen as a pioneer. Change is followed elsewhere in USA’s footsteps…” pause “when it pertains the rights of LGBTQ,” someone said. “Because we’re fighting for an international cause: the right to love.”

“Because at home, women are told they can’t dress too manly,” I added.

This video is mainly on Professor Lessig’s opinion on Prop 8. But his arguments on separating religion from state laws as well as definitions of love and marriage is applicable to all of us struggling with social and religious bias. Please watch and spread!

Lawrence Lessig (born June 3, 1961) is an American academic and political activist. He is a professor of law at Stanford Law School and founder of its Center for Internet and Society. Lessig is a founding board member of Creative Commons, a board member of the Software Freedom Law Center and a former board member of the Electronic Frontier Foundation.[1] He is best known as a proponent of reduced legal restrictions on copyright, trademark and radio frequency spectrum, particularly in technology applications. Excerpt from Wikipedia.

I had the opportunity to meet Professor Lessig on several occasions. Though always soft-spoken and polite, his speeches whether on legal copyright or political issues are very rousing.

I had the surprise of my life today when scanning through a local Japanese newspaper, I saw two familiar faces sprawling on an ad. After a quick glance at the caption, I realized I did indeed know these two women. I wanted to share their ad and their story with you.

Margot and Koko have been together for 12 years. Along the process, they decided to have a child together - a beautiful precocious girl who is 4 years old now. I had the fortune to attend their commitment ceremony back in 2002. It was a beautiful ceremony held in the rolling green hills of Oakland, California. There were some initial drama but in the end love prevailed and both families attend the ceremony.

Margot and Koko both are very active in the LBGT community in the micro and macro level. I remember when I first came out, they were both there to give me supporting shoulders and friendly ears. Many Asian Pacific Islander (API) lesbians can attest to the same. They are also involved in almost every major LGBT initiatives in the Bay Area since I can remember. Not only were they instrumental in publishing a Chinese-English coming out booklet* but they are key principles of the API LGBT events around the Bay Area as well.

Margot’s stories about coming out to her parents inspired me to be open to mine. Margot, who is originally from Sabah, is open about her sexual orientation and her relationship with Koko to her family. The trust and support given to her in return by her parents is truly inspirational.

Evidence to this support is in the marketing spread where Margot’s dad joins their fight against California Prop 8.

I find their energy and dedication to each other and to the community very inspiring.

Here is the ad and the translation:

Ad Translation:
“My wife and I have been married for 50 years. And now, my daughter and her partner have the chance to do the same” – James Yapp.

We knew Koko was the one for Margot when we met her. They met at the Lunar New Year parade, the Year of the Rat. Koko was wearing mouse ears and chatting with everyone. She has always been open with us, and she and Margot love each other. My wife Teoto and I love seeing them taking care of one another, so happy together, year after year.

After 11 years as a couple, California finally allowed Margot and Koko to get legally married. We supported their marriage every step of the way – literally! Together, my wife and I walked Margot down the aisle. We are all family now and family matters so much.

STRONG COMMITMENTS. STRONG FAMILIES.

Join the conversation at www.californiaring.org
================

In the couple’s own words “We want to spread the word out to as many California voters we can get. Please vote no on Prop 8!”

* 4th edition of “Beloved Daughter” booklet contains 14 stories by parents and siblings of Chinese lesbians about their coming-out in both Chinese and English. Please email MAPBLN for a FREE copy!

Voice Comment: (206) 888-JOHN

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Duration: 35:04 | 16.5 MB | Mono |

I’m scaling down. In more ways than one. Instead of telling you about my opinion about China, how the West look at China, and all the big issues, I’m telling you a very personal story about my growing up, being a little gay boy.

Seriously.

Free-wheeling bachelors like me wouldn’t even think twice about mouthing the occasional swear word - or ten. Even a prim mealy-mouthed fella like me. After all without the pitter patter of lil feet in the house, there’s very little fear of lil ears around to eavesdrop - and then for lil potty mouths to imitate! Embarassingly enough. Doubt there’s anything quite as unnerving as an adorable pink-cheeked five year old with pigtails screaming Muthafucka for all to hear in the sandbox.

So what happens when they find something even more shocking to tell?

I’ve mentioned in passing the horrific sodomy scandal that has swept across our political stage. Yet again. With the frequent ( annual? ) accusations, who knows in time buggering cases could possibly be as common as horny political interns.

However it never occurred to me that concerned parents would be quite as appalled with the sensational news reports for far different reasons. Seems like such reports are peppering the innocent thoughts of the young with shocking scandals of sodomy and rape! So much so that a nine year old would look up from the sunday papers with guileless eyes and ask her mom exactly what two men can do together that could potentially land them in prison.

Wonder what other positions I could get into with this guy!
Sure, I could address that pertinent question with several graphic sketches ( I can seriously imagine dozens of unnatural positions two men could get into together! ) but I don’t think such X-rated viewing would be suitable for minors. Not sure how my colleague answered her ingenuous daughter though - but I’m sure she must have choked on her breakfast pappadams - and the unwelcome thought.

Why, even the title of this post gives me pause - since the cheesy line smacks of nasty incestuous gay daddy porn.

I’ll admit to hiding a secret smirk when she told me. Fortunately my colleague didn’t retreat into a wild homophobic rant forcing me to raise the cudgels in defence. In fact she actually found herself far more irritated with the news-hungry journalists spreading such tawdry tabloid stuff rather than concentrating on more worldly issues.

Though I know I’ll find myself flabbergasted if I had such a query posed to me by my hypothetical child as well. Sex talk with curious rugrats freaks me out. And you know how bloody persistent kids that age can be with their overly inquisitive questions.

Nate : What’s sodomy, daddy?
Paul : What the f- frickin chicken! Who taught you that word? Have you been reading daddy’s bedtime stories again?
Nate : No, I read it in the papers. What’s sodomy, daddy?
Paul : Look, there’s a bird at the window.
Nate : What’s sodomy, daddy?
Paul : Daddy will buy you a present today. Isn’t that fun?
Nate : But what’s sodomy, daddy?
Paul : Ooh look at the time. Eat up your breakfast, Nate. It’s time for school.

Hey, I don’t have the answers to everything.

Most of us who are gay, bi, or trans, at some point in our lives, we all face the challenge of breaking the news to our parents. Some of us call that coming out, that’s only if we’re lucky, regardless of the outcome.

Even though most of us in Malaysia still don’t have that opportunity, it’s always inspiring to hear a happy ending to a coming out story.

I did this audio interview for my own podcast, Ongline Podcast, for Mother’s Day, and I hope you’ll enjoy and be inspired by this mother. I am hoping that this recording will reach both queer children and especially parents of queer children. Parents who put their children ahead of their own selves.

Use the player below to listen to the show.

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Or download the MP3 file, use this link. (Right click to download)

In September 2007, the Syariah Court annulled Mohd Sufian Mohamad and Zaiton Aziz’s marriage. The court issued the couple a permanent divorce, despite Zaiton Aziz saying that she was in a physically and emotionally satisfying union.

The judge who presided over the case declared the same-sex marriage illegitimate because of Mohd Sufian’s original gender designation.

The judge who presided over the case declared the same-sex marriage illegitimate because of Mohd Sufian’s original gender designation.

According to a New Straits Times article, three doctors had conducted physical examinations and blood tests on Mohd Sufian and concluded that he is a woman.

The doctors should have conducted a psychological or psychiatric evaluation to determine Mohd Sufian’s state of mind.

Read the full article at: thecicak.com